Drag Me To Hell
Five of Seven Cows
It’s probably a fair assumption that my choice of seeing Drag Me To Hell over the apparently universally-loved Up had something to do with my mood this week. For me to choose the hounds of hell over talking doggies (and we all know how much I love talking doggies) speaks volumes. But this isn’t a mood review; it’s a movie review so let’s get on with it. There’s an animated movie called Up. Everyone loves it. It has a crotchety old man (I think) and talking doggies (at least one) and is funny and should not be missed (except by me) so by all means grab the kiddies and go see it.
And now back to Hell.
Drag Me To Hell is a horror film starring Allison Lohman and Justin Long that blessedly doesn’t take itself too seriously. While giving nothing away in the gross-out category to other recent horror flicks, Drag Me To Hell actually has a sense of humor that gives it a leg up on most others. Sometimes I didn’t know if I was horse-laughing or trying to keep from vomiting. Turns out it was about fifty/fifty.
Lohman plays Christine Brown, an aspiring bank assistant-manager who incurs a gypsy’s curse when she orders the foreclosure on her home. What follows is a disgusting but hilarious battle royale with the above-mentioned gypsy, played by Lorna Raver, and Brown, followed by demon-stalking and futile attempts at animal sacrifice. Given current economic conditions, this should be mandatory viewing for bank managers everywhere. I’m just saying…
Lorna Raver plays a spectacularly-creepy gypsy woman, and one has to wonder if there simply aren’t enough gypsies to make up a decent-sized civil-rights organization to fight racial stereotypes. It’s hard to believe the social/political nannies have overlooked a group to feel aggrieved for, but thank goodness for it as this movie would have been no fun without the spooky gypsy woman with the evil eye.
If you have kids or a weak constitution, or, well, taste, by all means go see Up. I haven’t, but the public has spoken and it’s a hit. If, however, you are looking for something that will make you laugh so hard that the vomit shoots out your nose -- and honestly, who isn’t? – then Drag Me To Hell may be right up your alley. I give it five cursed, demonically-possessed gypsy cows which begs the question; if a cow is dragged to hell, how is that different than a Bar-B-Q?
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